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Freelance, traveling model. I love being underwater, climbing mountains, and following my bliss. I want to normalize nudity, express strength in my feminity, and share a love of nature. No erotic content.
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I don't quickly associate vineyards and Zurich, but I really liked this vineyard just outside the city. Zurich was the nicest city I visited in Europe I think. Though I did like a few of the others for different reasons. It helped that there was some rain and it made the weather more enjoyable in Zurich than elsewhere. Zurich was the cleanest city. The water was blue, the buildings were pretty, and it smelled of flowers instead of urine like many of the other cities. It's so strange to me that most cities stink so much. I can understand why, but it stills seems strange that people don't seem to mind.
I wish some of these photos were a bit better. The lighting changed frequently and I was a. bit rushed. I didn't realize nudity was legal in Zurich, so I tried to quickly shoot and not offend anyone. These photos still portray the Zurich I saw. The mountains in the background, old buildings, nice shady roads... I appreciate Roarie Yum for helping me take these photos. It would've been so much harder to shoot these without them.
While Europe hasn't been my favorite relaxation destinations the last two years (mostly the heat), I still l get this feeling like there is more to see and I'd be happy to go back. I feel like I saw the most surface layer of Europe, and not the real pulse of each city. Everywhere has its own culture, and my favorite part of traveling is tapping into that. Sometimes touring allows me a deeper look and sometimes I feel like I've only gotten a superficial glance. It really is most cities in most countries. Every time I come home I realize what I took for granted, and I'm more fascinated by the culture I grew up in. I'm overwhelmed by the amount there is to learn and absorb. I could never leave the USA again and still be fascinated by the pockets all over the country. But I do learn a lot too going to such different countries. The trick is to not get too absorbed into the tourist culture. If that's what you like then go for it! But I find the tourist culture a bit generic. It's the moment I'm in a quiet street that I feel like I'm seeing what version of home the city has.
Jumping right back into a new tour or are-bump of the long tour Iโve been on. Went for a short break in Seattle after I got back from Europe. Starting my trip in NYC. I feel intimidated trying to figure out the transit system here again and so nervous about going to Canada for the first time. I know itโll be like any tour, but I canโt help wondering what will go wrong or could go wrong. This is how most yours start for me and then they seem to find their own way. It has been such a strange year though Iโve wondered what else could change. Sometimes I get the sense that it is all like how it was but then Iโll be reminded of how we were locked down for 2 years and there has become a shift in the world. Not a large one in most cases but a bit of a shift
Preview of my adventures this last month.
Thanks to Roarie Yum for helping me with some of these photos. Theyโve been a treat this trip showing me around Europe. We had a lot of tourist moments and misadventures. We missed a bus in Copenhagen to enjoy wine on a balcony all night. That wasnโt our smartest plan but it was fun in the end and worth it I think. We got to know each other really well this trip as what happens on tours. We get so close to each other for long periods of time. Itโs hard to find someone that balances you out well but Roarie has such a solid head on their shoulders. We made it through our missed the bus kind of moments and enjoyed our drinking wine on the balcony ones. We had a lot of convos walking through Zurich and Amsterdam. And got excited to photograph each other in front of the Louvre
I havenโt taken many selfies at all. But I did see this beautiful rainbow. Of course, for my last week in Europe, the weather has turned chilly, random bouts of rain and lots of wind. The month has been hot and non stop sun. I havenโt been dressed right for either weather but I was at least more prepared for the heat. Usually June is chillier in Europe though. The last few years have been strange and had heat waves with droughts. It is good that suddenly the rain has returned, but it brings the temperature down dramatically. Iโve been living out of a backpack the last month and didnโt have room for various weather. I have a light fleece button up to keep me warm. It has been perfect until this point. The good news is that my brother visits this week as well and brought extra sweaters so Iโve been borrowing clothes. Iโm pretty sure my grandmother thinks there is something wrong with me. She canโt understand why Iโm not looking to get married and dress like a boy. Unfortunately, she doesnโt speak any English and I donโt speak German. So who knows what she assumes, but she has made it clear she doesnโt like my boots at all. I use to have an easier time living out if a backpack for a month when I modeled more nude looks. Knowing I canโt easily post my work has made me question what I shoot and why. A lot was for marketing and memories, but what do I want to make artistically, that fulfills me whether I can post it or not? I havenโt given myself much time to explore that but I hope to. I just need more time in my life. Iโve prioritized work and travel. I do like traveling. Itโs just getting uncomfortable to do long term. I end up missing my cat, my lotion, my jacket, etc. I think at a certain point it is annoying that my skin ends up irritated with experiencing the different water in each area. I realized though it doesnโt have to be all or nothing. Just a better balance. I can travel and be at home. Because I realize I donโt like being at home long either. What a conundrum! I do think I need more time to be bored if I want to be more creative. It takes time to think, collect, experiment and build that living out of a backpack doesnโt afford.
Traveling through Europe! Itโs been an adventure and full or errors. Sometimes Iโm so tired of life being a learning experience, but today I treated myself in Amsterdam. I think thatโs what it really is. Life will be missed buses and missed sleep from having a hard time sleeping on buses. I got a hotel to treat myself only to find a million restrictions for their sauna and fitness center. I had been so looking forward to it. Finally, I walked around Amsterdam and bought a hat and new backpack and it is those little things that gave me such a relief!!! Iโve only had two shoots in Europe so far. Unfortunately I wasnโt able to schedule much (another learning experience). In some ways Iโm relieved because Iโd be so tired from the frequent travel and lack of settling anywhere. Iโm getting to see bits of the city too. Iโm trying to enjoy being a tourist. Iโm on the fence if Iโd tour Europe again. It is hard to convert the money back to usd, the rates are so little, and the travel takes so long. Not to say I havenโt enjoyed my experience, but when it comes to finding fulfillment modeling, Iโm missing it here. I want to come back and take plenty of self portraits, but one day
Under the Water in Copenhagen
Been a tired one!
Itโs been a trek from Atlanta to Philadelphia and then to New York and finally Oslo. Iโve been in Europe now a few hours and Iโm so calm. Something about being somewhere strange seems normal now.
Iโm so anxious for the adventures and kicking myself for all the mistakes Iโve already made. Iโd be less upset if there had only been one or two. Iโm trying to remind myself this is my first time touring Europe and a lot of the logistics are new to me. That has not calmed my nerves. Tomorrow will be a new day for new mistakes and experiences.
Just falling asleep despite that the sun is still up at 11pm here. I find it oddly relaxing that there is still light but Iโm sure itโll make trying to catch sunset annoying. Iโm curious about the sunrise. The internet says it will happen at 4am! This will make for interesting photos
Being back in Europe, makes me think so much of my past and all my regrets unfortunately. My inspiration has been to forge new memories and prove how much stronger I am now.
Maybe I can post these on twitter too. Just got back some photos from Belize! I need more trips like this. Itโs been so long since Iโve swam in non Chlorinated waters. I feel so alien in these underwater worlds.
I appreciate how Sarah Teveldal (the photographer here and known as Flashpool Productions) got me to act like I was on vacation for a few days.
Sorry it's taken me so long to post these. It's always one thing or another coming up in life, and then I hate to write a description when I'm too distracted.
This BnB in Mississippi was beautiful. I love the old vintage furnishings. I'm so inspired by places well decorated and I wish I could be more that person myself. I think I've finally accepted that I am not though. At least it gives me more ability to enjoy it when I see it.
I love finding treasure in forgotten spaces. I think of Mississippi as a forgotten space. Maybe it is just so forgotten to me. It is a state I always hear sad things about. My first or second trip through it was beating hot during a heat wave. This trip was so much better. The flowers were out and the weather was mild, cloudy with a chance of rain that would never come. This did make it harder for shooting indoors though. I find certain windows need more light than others. This room had high ceilings and was dark, despite it's many windows. The furniture was heavy and dark. I've been experimenting with this scarf technique over the lens. It creates a haze in some cases, and because of the iridescence in the threads the light will catch in ways that create light beams over the image. In this case, I love the added mystery to it. It builds anonymity that feels right for these images that are slightly voyeuristic. I'm not sure why voyeurism and anonymity go together in my mind because often I think the voyeur knows who they're watching. Maybe it is more of a comfort to be seen in one's space as one is without the pre-tense of the identity. It is the form and the actions of someone now, over making assumptions based on knowing someone's history.
Made it to Costa Rica for my next workshop with Dakota Lee. I love working with her. She is so professional and funny. Her vibe gives me so much energy!
A photographer joined us and is helping out with the first part of our mission. The scouting! We have a good little group going right now.
Today we checked out the ocean and a waterfall but all the travel left us exhausted! We came back early and crashed for a few hours. Much needed! I really needed to catch up on the rest myself.
Iโd love to see the sunrises and sunsets here. Hopefully tomorrow Iโll see one of them!
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